Friday, November 9, 2012

Choosing Happiness

 I have been a bit under the weather, and not posting much. So I decided to share this piece that I posted on Storylane. I hope to be on more very soon. Thanks for hanging in with me.

I am an old woman now. Living in, as people used to day, "reduced circumstances", meaning there is always more month than there is money. The love of my life is gone. My children are grown, with homes and families of their own. My companions are my beloved "furbabies". My health is deteriorating, with new issues popping up on a regular basis. I do not leave my home often these days, and rarely venture further than the tiny nearby town. Yet, I am happy, content, ready to greet each day with a smile, rejoicing in the sunshine or the rain. Delighting in the smell of my morning coffee, eager to talk to my daughters when they call to tell see how I am, and to tell me they love me. Laughing at the antics of my silly cats, going through my daily chores with a song in my heart and on my lips, although these days, the voice cracks.
I moved here after I retired, and I do not actually have any friends around here. Which is a surprise to me, as I have always been surrounded by friends. I grew up in a  military family, married into the military, and have lived so many places, and I always quickly made friends, became involved in the community, and made a home wherever I happened to be. Here, it is different. In this rural area of the Ozarks, people are very nice, very warm and kind. But they do not "take" to outsiders. And an outsider is anyone whose family has not lived here for generations. So, it can be lonely.
Yet, I am happy. Why, you ask? Because I choose to be. Because happiness is a choice. Nobody is happy all the time. One is ill, the bills are overdue, there are family problems, the roof leaks. There is always a reason, an excuse really, for not being happy. I believe it is a matter of perspective. If you are ill or in pain, you are alive. The overdue bills means you had heat, or your car repairs were done, or whatever it is that must now be paid for. The roof leaks? Hey, you have a roof over your head, and in these difficult times, there are many who do not.
I find it annoying when people constantly complain, throw themselves a pity party over every little glitch in their road. Woe, woe is me becomes a refrain, like the old skit that was on Hee Haw, the one where the people were on the porch with an old hound dog, singing "Gloom, despair, and agony on me, Deep, dark depression, excessive misery. If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all. Gloom, despair, and agony on me".
I am here to tell you, as long as you sit on the porch and moan, you are, indeed, going to have misery. Get up, people!! Look around you, count your blessings. Decide that if you are not feeling happy today, you will behave as if you are. And more than likely, your mood will lighten, and you actually will feel better. If you cannot pull yourself out of a state of depression or unhappiness, get some help, or make some changes, whatever it takes. See your doctor, if there is no physical cause, then perhaps a medication or counseling is in order. If there is something that is holding you back, such as a volatile  relationship, either change it, or get out of it. Do what you need to do in order to make it possible to be happy, and choose to be so. Life is far too short to sit on the porch and moan!!!

19 comments:

  1. Wow! Loved this thought provoking essay and amen to it. Blessings all around us in just the simple things even though we might wish some things were different. Attitude is everything. Hope you feel better soon.

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    1. Thank you so much, Dewena. I am on the mend, just taking a bit longer than I hoped. But, I am blessed, and I count my followers among my blessings.

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  2. such a well written post! I agree with you, don't sit on the porch and gripe. Happiness is a state of mind not a state of being.

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    1. Thanks for coming by, Daniela, so glad you agree with me. See you again soon. Blessings

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  3. How lovely Sandra! I love the "more month than money"!! So true for so many of us at one time or another in our lives! Had to laugh the HeeHaw memory too! You are such an awesome writer with a little wisdom to impart to all of us! Thank you!

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  4. Loved all his writing was so exciting for me. just look just the simple things that are all around us and often we do not. have a good attitude is everything. I lovely Sandra

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  5. Awesome. I loved it all. It is always hard moving to a new place and especially if one is not in the work force. I've heard about the Ozarks but have not been there. Maybe sometime you could write about why you selected this place or maybe you have and I have not read it. I would also like to have your address....I would like to send you something.....email me at jbaxter10@cox.net
    Have a great weekend. We are having a little rain. Hugs.

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    1. There is always skype where two people could visit & get to know each other.

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  6. What a touching and beautiful post. I wish I lived closer because I would be coming over often, sitting down for tea or coffee and a good chat. I am usually not a fan of lengthy posts but you have a way of engaging and drawing me in. I am always interested to hear what you have to say and how you deliver it AND I leave feeling positive and happy. You are one of those rare people that make things better...always.

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    1. Aw, Amy, how sweet of you! I wish you did live closer, what a joy it would be if we could visit. I worry about the length of my posts. I do not talk overmuch in person, but with a pen in my hand, or a keyboard in front of me, I can ramble on. Glad it doesn't keep you from reading.
      Blessings!

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  7. What a wonderful post!! Thank you! -Marci @ Stone Cottage Adventures

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  8. Beautiful! I might say "Words of Wisdom", especially at this time of the year when we are reminded to count our blessings!
    XO-Cristina

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  9. Thank you, Cristina, and thanks for stopping in. I hope you have a wonderful week! Blessings

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  10. Thank you for stopping by my blog, I admire your attitude. Women like you inspire me to keep a positive attitude, you must have so many experiences and wisdom. My hubby and I have to move a lot due to his job, I can relate to you.
    Abi K

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  11. Thanks, Abi. I have had a lot of experience--not so sure about the wisdom!!! When you move, just consider it an adventure, and the new location is home, for however long. Embrace each new place as if it is the best place on Earth, and for you, for the duration of your stay, it will be!

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